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容人之过 Tolerance

这周我们读了一篇文章。孔子说:“攻其恶,无攻人之恶”,又曰“躬自厚而薄责于人”。意思是抨击那些过错本身而不要去否定某人,经常自省而不指责他人。古语时常劝导人们“宽容”,但在当今日益浮躁的快节奏生活里,人们更常用从书中学到的道理苛责他人。“人非圣贤,孰能无过”,用圣贤的标准去要求他人,这不是自己的愚昧无知吗?更何况,如果道理不是用来要求自己、提高自己,那还有什么意义呢?如果我们能用更高的标准要求自己,时时反省自己,寻找自己的过错,就没有闲暇时间去挑剔别人的不是。反而,看见别人的过错,我们会反省自己。他人是我们的镜子,是我们端正、提高品行的良器,这时我们反而会感激,怎会与之计较?一个大气包容的人,涵养深厚,朋友众多;而一个斤斤计较的人,处处困于得失,流于琐碎,日渐狭隘。因为一点小事而斤斤计较,真正难受的只有自己。


This week we read an article. Confucius said: "Attack the evil of others, but not the evil of others." He also said, "Be generous to yourself and blame others lightly." It means criticizing the fault itself rather than denying someone, and often reflecting on oneself without blaming others. Ancient proverbs often advise people to be "tolerant", but in today's increasingly impetuous and fast-paced life, people more often use the principles learned from books to criticize others. "No one is a sage, and no one can do anything wrong." If you use the standards of a sage to demand others, isn't this your own ignorance? What's more, if the truth is not used to demand and improve oneself, then what is its meaning? If we can hold ourselves to higher standards, reflect on ourselves all the time, and look for our own faults, we won't have the leisure time to find fault with others. On the contrary, when we see the faults of others, we will reflect on ourselves. Others are our mirrors, a good tool for us to correct ourselves and improve our character. At this time, we will be grateful. How can we care about them? A person who is generous and tolerant has deep self-cultivation and many friends; while a person who cares about everything is trapped in gains and losses, becomes petty, and becomes increasingly narrow-minded. If you worry about trivial matters, the only one who really feels uncomfortable is yourself.

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